thesewhitelies

since my life is so interesting to strangers…

i should probably be callng my sponsor…but she’s asleep

 i don’t understand people and why they still continue to talk about me..

i’m old news…fuck…i even know this.

this has been on my mind and i’ve heard all kinds of crazy things…

apparently..im still hot shit..and alot of people keep tabs on me….

(sarcasm)

the fact is …i did a lot of fucked shit when i was drinking

i can own up to anything you ask me….alot of shit is hazy because alot of the time

i was at a complete back out..but i still know…except the night i went to jail…i don’t remember one single thing..oops.

im not afraid to share my demons….because it’s actually helpful to me and my progress

but for people to talk about the shit i did and stuff that is a complete lie

angry…because i don’t won’t to relive my past..but this is something i will be faced for the rest of my life…it’s progress not perfection

then grateful…to be like WOW…i don’t have to be that person anymore..i don’t have to drink..

i have an amazing sponsor , a supportive group, TRUE friends.

my sobriety is everything to me…and honestly i feel like alot of people want to watch me fail

….the alcoholic side of me says “oh really i’ll show you , watch me drink my brains out”

but the new me says “hey, thank you for reminding me of why I don’t drink..because i don’t have to be that person anymore”

so to everyone that wants to see me fail…keep your negative thoughts..ill add fuel to my fire to stay sober

im not promised tomorrow…but i hope and pray i stay sober

one day at a time